Ask me about my cactii


I can’t stand these fucking people with these fucking family window stickers on their cars a murderer is gonna come into your fucking house and you’re gonna try to hide your kids in the fucking closet and he’s gonna be like naw bitch I saw your fucking mini van I know you have six more kids where are they

(via suburbanwhitemomvevo)

76,136 notes

pro·cras·ti·na·tion prəˌkrastəˈnāSHən,prō-/ noun 1. the action of delaying or postponing something.

this is my “how every person abpve the age of 40 looks at a cell phone” face



i miss getting party bags at the end of parties why dont we still do that party bags were the best part of the party

It was like a reward for being sociable

(via pondering-duplexes)

337,547 notes


My fav thing about tumblr is the complete lack of country music it makes me feel like this is where I should be

(via pohtato)

128,346 notes


catch me in ur bathroom drinkin out the faucet cuz I’m too embarassed to ask ur mom where the cups are

(via perks-of-being-chinese)

137,982 notes

remember the time shrek 2 ended with the best animated music number ever for no apparent reason


(via joshrah)

365,924 notes


one time when I was 13 I wrote wtf on a Facebook status and my dad had a talk with me about being appropriate on the Internet

(Source: dildotho, via acidicmoons)

99,564 notes

Get it together, Barack


The human body has 7 trillion nerves and some people manage to get on every single fucking one of them

(Source: simpl-ic-ity, via crrovvleys)

675,503 notes

this baby lookin like a full grown adult and it’s fuckin me up